Rest is often oversimplified into the notion of needing more sleep. However, how many times have you slept the recommended amount and woke up still feeling utterly exhausted?
Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith, in her insightful book Sacred Rest, addressed the misperception of rest and identified that there are seven distinct types of rest, and that learning how to honor your body’s needs can help with genuinely restoring your energy. Let’s explore each type and the ways in which you could incorporate them into your routines with more intention.
1. Physical Rest
This is the most common perception of rest, however it includes more than just sleep.
Passive physical rest is the typical depiction of sleep and naps. When it comes to healthy amounts of sleep, adults typically require around 7 to 9 hours of rest, so it can be helpful to test out different amounts of sleep to discover what you feel the most rested after. For naps, it can be tempting to try to catch up on a poor night’s sleep by resting the afternoon away; however, sleep experts tend to suggest limiting naps to 30 minutes to avoid affecting your next night’s sleep.
Meanwhile, active physical rest includes activities that invite slow, intentional movements, such as walking, stretching, yoga, or therapeutic massage. Mindful movements can aid the nervous system in attuning to safety, promoting a sense of calm and relaxation. Incorporating activities that help you focus on your mind, body, and breath connection can improve overall concentration levels and lead to more sustained mood levels.
2. Mental Rest
This is the type of rest that allows you to quiet racing thoughts and helps you to slow down your mind.
Mental fatigue typically presents as overwhelming streams of thoughts, decision-making, and information overload. Providing your mind with a break includes stepping away from pressurized tasks and inviting in the slowness of menial tasks such as mindfully washing the dishes, gardening, or doing a puzzle. If your mind ever feels like it is running at an overwhelming pace, wrapped up in responsibilities and expectations, then there is an opportunity to learn how to meet the overwhelm with appropriate coping skills. Taking time for activities such as brain dumping, journaling, or meditation can aid in giving a pause to the go-go-go exhaustion.
3. Emotional Rest
This is the type of rest that honors your need to be authentically you.
Emotional work can be both at home and on the job. Emotional Labor is the effort that is put into suppressing or managing your reactions and editing your responses in an attempt to influence and maintain social connections. That feeling of always being ‘on’ can be exacerbated by people-pleasing tendencies and struggling with identifying your needs and asking for help.
Emotional rest is the art of learning how to express your feelings genuinely and understanding the value of vulnerability within trusted spaces. For example, being vulnerable with close friends when you’re struggling or opening up to a therapist about what you’re really afraid of. Building practices around emotional rest can include setting boundaries around when you need quiet time and how you engage with those who exhaust you. It can also help to practice getting curious with your emotions, involving both witnessing and validating your emotions to discover their underlying needs, such as a sense of safety, autonomy, worth, belonging, and/or play. Emotional rest ultimately comes from creating the room to both feel and express your authentic emotions.
4. Social Rest
This is the type of rest that is finding the balance between solo time and re-energizing within the community.
While most have heard about introverts and extroverts, it is helpful to understand that everyone can be affected by the type and quality of both the alone time and community time they engage with. Signs of social distress can be noted through feeling overbooked, stressed out, and depleted after spending time with others or simply struggling to find time for yourself.
Social rest includes bringing awareness to how you schedule your week and making fewer plans if you feel overwhelmed by the expectations of your week. One way to build trust in your ability to set aside time for yourself and rest is to schedule it in your calendar like any other important plan. Another way to begin to gauge how your social well-being is impacted by others is by noting how you feel before and after spending quality time with them, checking in to see if you feel more depleted, the same, or energized by the interaction. Whether you are a social butterfly or prefer time to yourself, bringing attention to how you feel, investing time in recharging, and being around others can be a way to take care of your well-being and create sustainability within your relationships.
5. Sensory Rest
This is the rest that centers around taking breaks from stimulating environments.
In this world, there is often constant stimulation moving from tiny to bigger screens with bright lights, notifications, and non-stop background noise. In modern times, doomscrolling or watching TV has become a common way to wind down after a long day. However, it is important to consider the body’s need for quiet, low-stimulation environments, especially before bed, and the impact of blue light (the type of light emitted from technology) on the brain’s perception of awakeness. Taking breaks can include taking a break from the screen an hour or two before bed. Going on walks without technology or having dinner without the distractions of TV or phones. Finding ways to turn off technology can help calm your senses and allow your brain to rest, which allows it to reconnect.
6. Creative Rest
This is the rest that is based around taking part in activities that activate a sense of awe.
Routines can become exhausting when there is a lack of newness or a sense of inspiration. If you’re in a creative field, sometimes the rest is taking away the pressure of creating for producing or selling to an audience, and it is instead focusing on what feels exciting and enlivening to invest your time into for you. The idea of investing in activities that invoke a sense of wonder, such as going to a museum, concert, or basking in nature, is about taking the time to appreciate beauty around you and allowing room for new ideas to blossom. It can be helpful to invest in hobbies such as writing, painting, sewing, or drawing just for the fun of creating something uniquely your own. In the day-to-day one can get disconnected from their sense of self, but having time allotted to expanding their perspective, voice, and skills can be enlivening.
7. Spiritual Rest
This type of rest is based on connecting to something bigger than yourself, and is embodied by finding and honoring how you make meaning.
Spirituality can be defined in so many ways, but this speaks to the heart of feeling and investing in connection. That ranges from faith and purpose to community and even a sense of inner belonging. Different ways to connect with this form of rest can be found in the discovery of how you make sense of the world around you. For some, connecting with their spirituality can be in appreciating nature, whether that is going to your local park, watching the sunset, or looking up at the stars. Others connect by going to religious services, spending time in their community, or volunteering for a cause that matters to them. Some ways to incorporate this into your routine are finding groups to invest your time in, intentional nature walks, and daily meditation or prayer. Taking time to discover what gives your life meaning can be a connective force on the hardest days and a gift of utter delight on others.
Final Thoughts: True Rest Is Holistic
Rest isn’t about turning off or escaping from your reality; it’s genuinely about discovering what restores you. Your resting needs will likely shift time and time again, which is why it can be helpful to make a practice of tuning in to discover how your needs continue to evolve.
When you begin the work of identifying and listening to your body’s messages for rest, you are building the tools of sustainability. You may need more genuine sleep, or you could be lacking the transparency, quiet time, boundaries, acceptance, sense of connection, and/or inspiration that support you in being yourself. We invite you to take the time to slow down and listen in, as so often the answers to why we feel disconnected are found in the intentional pauses.
Carly Rose Schwan is a Certified Anger Management Counselor and an Associate Marriage and Family Therapist #145079 at Avedian Counseling Centers under the licensed supervision of Chrys Gkotsi, LMFT #113638. Offering individual and couples therapy in Glendale and Los Angeles, Carly Rose specializes in helping empower individuals to face their vulnerability and work toward acceptance instead of struggling with anger and low self-esteem.
Ready to start your journey toward sustainable well-being? Contact Avedian Counseling Center today for a consultation in Glendale or Los Angeles.
