Have you ever lost someone you loved and felt so angry about it that you didn’t want help?
No therapy. No grief support. No groups. No one is telling you it will “get better”. One of the most common questions I hear is:
“What will therapy actually do when I’ve lost someone I love?”
And my honest answer is this: Therapy will not bring them back. It will not erase the pain.
It will not rush your healing.
How Can Therapy Help My Grief?
What therapy can offer is something quieter, and often more powerful. It provides a space where your feelings of despair, anger, numbness, guilt, or confusion can exist without being minimized or fixed. It is a place where you are allowed to feel exactly what you feel.
Grief is not something you get over. Healing is not about “moving on.” It is about learning how to carry the loss without losing yourself.
Losing someone close to you, regardless of the circumstances, can be traumatic. Grief can leave you feeling frozen, disconnected from your body, unable to focus, or emotionally paralyzed. You may not recognize yourself. You may feel irritable, withdrawn, or overwhelmed by unpredictable waves of emotion.
Therapy is not about fixing grief. It is about gently helping you begin to move again, breathe more fully, reconnect with your body, and slowly return to parts of yourself that went quiet after the loss.
“I’m a Burden with My Grief”
Many people learn to carry and hide their grief out of shame or because they do not trust that others will understand. We may worry about being “too much.” We may feel pressure to stay strong. We may sense that others are uncomfortable with our pain. So we function. We smile. We pretend we are okay.
But hidden grief does not disappear. Over time, suppressing grief can disconnect us from ourselves. It can make it more difficult to be transparent in relationships, more challenging to receive love, and harder to feel safe, allowing joy back into our lives. Avoiding grief often protects us in the short term. In the long term, it can quietly isolate us.
When Will I Get Over My Grief?
Therapy works when there is room for you to show up exactly as you are — angry, numb, devastated, confused, or exhausted.
There is no right timeline for grief. There is no “correct” way to heal. There is only permission — permission to feel, to mourn, to pause, and to move forward when you are ready.
Grief changes you, but it does not have to take you away from yourself. If you are navigating loss and unsure whether therapy can help, know this: you do not have to face it alone, and you do not have to be ready to “feel better” to begin.
At Avedian Counseling Center, our Los Angeles counselors offer therapy to help people dealing with grief and loss. Contact us for a complimentary 10-minute consultation. You don’t have to walk through your grief alone.
Chrys Gkotsi, LMFT, is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in Los Angeles, California, specializing in anxiety, anger, depression, abuse, loss, adjustment issues, personality disorders, and relationship problems. Fluent in Greek and German, she has six years of experience working with couples, teens, and individuals, with a deep understanding of cultural issues.
As an eclectic therapist, Chrys integrates Client-Centered and Attachment theoretical approaches to help clients find their inner selves, resolve emotional conflicts, and improve their quality of life. Her authentic and empathetic approach aids in healing emotional wounds, creating healthier attachments, and fostering fulfilling relationships.
