In a world of texts, DMs, and emails, picking up the phone can feel outdated, possibly even terrifying. The fear of phone calls (making and receiving) is called telephobia, and for many in Gen Z, it’s a real struggle. So why is this generation, raised in the digital age, avoiding phone calls as much as possible?
Why are Phone Calls Terrifying?
There are multiple reasons why Gen Z, those born in the years spanning 1997-2012, are known to struggle with using phones for their intended purpose – making and receiving phone calls:
- Text-first culture – The pause in communication granted by messaging allows time to craft well-worded responses, unlike the pressure of real-time conversation where there is no true pause to think through answers.
- Fear of discomfort – The lulls in real-time conversation, awkward silences, miscommunication, or the prospect of “saying the wrong thing” can feel overwhelming, all of which can be exacerbated by the fact that phone calls do not include visual cues of the other person’s facial expressions, increasing the sense of uncertainty and amplifying the perceived awkwardness within the conversation.
- Lack of practice – Growing up in a digital-first world, the lack of exposure to frequent phone calls and live conversations has meant fewer chances to get comfortable with communication styles outside of chat apps.
How Does Telephobia Affect Daily Life?
Though difficulty making or receiving phone calls might not seem like much of an issue, it can actually impact Gen Z’s ability to sit through job interviews, make client calls, participate in networking, or to appropriately engage in workplace communication. It can also affect simple tasks like booking appointments or handling customer service requests, turning those activities into stressful hurdles to overcome.
The consequences of avoiding phone calls might also be seen within generational shifts in communication expectations, resulting in a divide between older and younger age groups as they struggle to connect using methods that get lost in translation. For example, Gen Z might view a phone call as overkill when making plans, while older generations might perceive text messages to show disinterest. While Gen Z might prefer using Slack, emails, or video calls, their counterparts from an older generation might feel more comfortable with a phone call to iron out project details.
Another consideration is that the more one avoids what may be uncomfortable for them, the more they fear the situation. For folks who struggle with Social Anxiety Disorder need to challenge themselves to engage in activities that are uncomfortable for them. Avoiding phone calls will only exacerbate the fear of phone calls.
How to Overcome Phone Anxiety?
- Prepare notes – To help build confidence and feel more in control of the situation, create a script, gather notes, or jot down key points before dialing
- Start small – Begin practicing with low-stakes calls, like ordering takeout. Keep practicing by building up to making appointments or contacting customer service. Practicing results in repeated exposure to the difficult behavior, reducing discomfort over time
- Reframe your mindset – Remember that a phone call is just another way to communicate, not a test to assess how quickly you can think on your feet. To balance digital and verbal communication, recognize when making a call is necessary, such as for the sake of effectiveness, efficiency, or professionalism.
While telephobia is a common and understandable struggle for Gen Z, it doesn’t have to be a lifelong hurdle. By gradually building confidence through practice, preparation, and a shift in perspective, making and receiving phone calls can become less daunting and significantly more manageable. In a world that values both efficiency and connection, overcoming telephobia allows Gen Z to expand their communication skills for personal and professional growth, bridging generational gaps and opening doors to new opportunities.
Silva Depanian is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (MFC#121864) and Certified Anger Management Counselor at Avedian Counseling Center, offering services via telehealth and in Glendale. She specializes in chronic pain management, anxiety, anger management, and codependent relationships, working with individuals and groups who are seeking a more fulfilling quality of life. Silva’s mission is to help clients achieve their goals using Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and Mindfulness techniques, through encouraging change, boundary setting, and healthy communication. Whether in individual sessions or group settings, Silva is here to listen, and works in tandem with clients on their journey towards balance and happiness.
